Nice work! I really love the build-up of suspense, and the chapters just keep on getting better and better. Keep varying the length of your sentences and your figures of speech, and the world will be putty in your hands. :3

You always leave us leaning forward in our chairs at the end of each chapter, and I can't wait for the next one! There's so many questions to be answered! (:D

I'm very glad to see that my site is of at least some use, and am honoured that you decided to incorporate an urban legend in your tale after reading my post. Excellent work! Keep it up, because you've got talent!

- Tendra